I’ll be honest. I haven’t been doing such a great job of eating healthy these last few weeks. Sure I’m trying to make healthy choices. It’s just that I’ve been traveling.
Just last week I saw my endocrinologist. At this visit, it just happened to be that time of year. The time where they do all the laboratory tests to see if there are any issues that may be lurking just under the surface. Flying under my symptom radar so to speak. And so we did all the tests.
I got married in July of the year I turned 24. At Thanksgiving of that very same year members of my family were already asking about when my new husband and I were going to start having kids. My answers, at first, were “I don’t know” and “when we’re ready.” But the same question kept occurring at every family occasion and I began to get annoyed. And then one day I was so fed up that I’d had enough and angrily answered, “Never! I hate kids!” That did the trick and I didn’t get that question again for a LONG time.
It’s all taboo, right? Your period in general, but also your period and diabetes.
BUT THEN- you add mental health and body image to the mix.
So let’s make it more taboo- harder to talk about. More to work through.
I was in my late 20s when I had an abnormal EKG during my annual physical. The doctor I had at the time freaked out. He immediately scheduled me for a cardiac stress test. He prescribed blood pressure and cholesterol medications. It was all very disconcerting.
The last “update” I did on how I was doing with everything was in the fall for events that happened in August. For the most part things calmed down and went well for a few months. but I still didn’t trust my body. I haven’t really wanted to talk about things not working well too much. I’m tired of talking about it, and in my mind… maybe if I don’t admit it outloud, everything’s okay, right?
Well- everything was fine until the end of November. Continuous birth control was working. I wasn’t having a period at all. Now I have “goals.” I know what’s like not to be miserable when I don’t have a period. I felt better. My blood sugars were stabilizing. The pain was minimal. I felt stronger. I was sleeping better. I could go on with how I felt those first few months. Superficially? My skin was clearing up and hair growth all over my body was slowing down. Seriously, I could keep going. Yet, I still didn’t trust my body. Sometimes, I wonder if I ever will?
The holidays are over and it’s a bright new year. I’m sure that just like everyone else - certainly like me - you have some resolutions for this new year. Some of my biggest resolutions this year include spending more time outdoors, being more active, and doing more of what makes me happy. Seems simple...right? Well, it should be. But then there’s my constant companion, diabetes. It is the one thing that adds complication to pretty much everything. (Even as I sat trying to write this blog post, my Dexcom CGM started giving me that dreaded “low glucose alert”.)
Happy Holidays, Diabetes Sisters! This is my last blog post for a while, as I'm feeling the need to tuck into my personal relationships and honor my work/life balance. While I won't be contributing regularly, fingers crossed I'll pop back in from time to time and join in on the conversation.
It's almost Christmas, and here in Montana the snow is piling up and I'm rolling from one holiday party to the next. We still have 2 more weeks of festivities to go, so I'm holding tight and getting out my eating pants.