Hi Maeve.  Nice to meet you.  (you have one of my most favorite names ever ) :)    Yep, me too.  I lost tons of weight when I was first diagnosed,  I was so terrified I barely ate a thing, but I'm back to my old overeating ways, but can't binge on pastry, bread, rice, potatoes, pizza and pasta like I used to.  I've gained about 10 of the 50 pounds I initially lost, but I still should lose at least 60 pounds more.  I am bored to tears in my old age and just eat out of boredom really.  I guess I got used to just comforting myself with food and it is a bad bad habit now.  I don't see any improvement for my future either.  I hate hate hate exercising and have lots of neuropathy pain so do not like walking.  I guess it is going to be one long haul for me, hopefully I won't last much longer, LOL.  My husband has been so mean and unsupportive I'm really thinking about divorce, even now, after 45 years of marriage.   It's one thing to be diabetic and miserable not being able to eat any of my old standbys, but being diabetic, miserable and on the verge of murdering him every five minutes surely does not bode well for my emotional and mental health :)

I found this site today.  You both make me feel that at I am not the only one who feels this way.  My husband of 33 years passed away last November.  He was also diabetic, and we were each other's support as well as best friend.  I realized after his death that I really have no other friends - we both very much did everything together, and pretty much stayed at home.  As a result, I do not eat correctly now, and have gained 6 pounds.  (I need to lose about 40 more pounds - had already lost 40 over the last 4 years.)  My numbers are now way out of control.  I need to get back on track, but knowing that and doing that are two very different things.  It is so hard!  I am slowly convincing myself that I need to take care of myself so I can be here for my dog, Buddy.  He is a 14 year old rat terrier, and very much my companion.  He makes me laugh and smile.  I am the only one who can lower my numbers and make my health better.  It helps knowing that I am not the only one who feels disappointed and, in my case, maybe a little depressed.  I look forward to talking to you both thru this blog. 

Hi there munchkin.  I'm so sorry to hear about the loss of your hubby, so definitely a tragedy that is so hard to bounce back from.   My husband is not so derserving of any thought from me right now.  Last night he screamed at me something awful about dinner, salmon, cauliflower and cheese casserole, doesn't see why he has to eat "this crap".  I am NOT cooking two meals.  If I have to cook a certain way for my health now, and he doesn't like it, he can go eat out or cook for himself.  I do not think I will put up with this much longer.  what a jerk.  Yes, even knowing what i should do doesn't make it easy to implement, I am so set in bad eating patterns and i only seem to want to lose weight if I have something special off in the future that I want to look nice for.  My doctor says I really only need to lose about 40 pounds, but I'm thinking no, I really want to get another 50-55 off.  Even then I won't be  any skinny mini, I MIGHT get my butt into size 14 again.  Right now, after my 40 pound weight loss, I have no clothes that fit, and can't afford even a few thrift store buys.  i'm living on a very sparse fixed income that will get a bit better when the medicare kicks in a couple of months.     Otherwise, day to day to day,  I just don't seem to care about myself at all.  living alone is so hard and I am so envious about little Buddy.  How great would having a pet be?  But I am highly allergic to every animal on this planet and should a pet get ill, i would be hard pressed to be able to afford a vet bill.    I am surprised there is so little activity around here.  I did like the local diabetes sisters meeting I went to, nice ladies there, but there was some not so nice gossip about this web site.  People get kicked off all the time so they said.  Maybe that is why you are the only two people I have met here.  You hang in there.  I'm sorry to hear your numbers are high.  I'm doing pretty well with my glucose readings, My 3 month reading was a nice low 6.5.   I just can't seem to stop eating all the time  I asked my doctor for an appetite suppressant and she refused.  I don't know, you'd think when your life is on the line, your vision, your risk for so many complications, they'd help you out a bit and make it just a bit easier.  I am not a huge fan of doctors, rotflmao.

I forgot to come back and check for replies.  I hear you both.  When I feel like exercising, I lay down until the feeling goes away.  Seriously, I really hate it.  I don't like to sweat.  I think my weight problem is more about not moving than it is about eating.  Well, I am trying.  I take the stairs when I can. Not too many of them and I park farther away than I have to.  I used to put on some old music and dance around the house, but I don't have the energy for that anymore.
So I share you problems.  We will just have to keep trying.